Banner image ID: Cassidy holding a light in the dark under the a starry night sky and the Milky Way. Text reads Caregiver Coaching.
Caregiver Coaching
First up, let’s tackle the definitions from which I’m operating. Traditionally, this service is marketed as ‘Parent Coaching.’ That falls short of honoring the many roles and family structures in which one might ‘parent.’ If you are a grown up raising one or more humans of any age, you are in the role of ‘CAREGIVER’ and these services are for you.
Folks have the option to sign up for themselves, themselves and a partner/partners, or any combination of grown ups involved in a kid’s life. Here’s to the ‘Raisins’ (i.e., those in the role of “raising” a child). Whatever way you define family will be supported, whether that’s as a solo caregiver, those in Poly or Queer partnerships, marriage, platonic co-caregiving, divorced co-caregiving, step/bonus caregiving, etc.
Here you are. Looking for something. Because you need support and everywhere you look, you see the facade of grown ups raising perfect children, grown ups who never have to say sorry for snapping or shutting down. You see others raising kids with a perceived ease you can’t currently fathom.
You aren’t alone.
Caregivers are bombarded with information from podcasts and reels and books and blogs and unsolicited advice from well-meaning loved ones, and often wind up feeling inadequate.
I see you.
You may have looked into coaching after first looking into therapy for your kid. After some reflection (or a less than stellar therapy experience), you found yourself pondering
‘wait a second, the things I’m concerned about aren’t quite that. I’m more worried about how my role in all this. Am I providing the most supportive environment for my kiddo(s)? I feel like my intentions keep missing the mark, and I'm not sure why.' If this is you, I got you! Your intuition is telling you that what’s called for in this moment relates to how you are showing up. Trust your intuition and get the support you need.
If any of what you have read so far has resonated with you, it’s likely that one of the following statements rings true:
If you are like many participants I've worked with, you are still second guessing this path. You’ve been taught to prioritize your kid(s) and deprioritize yourself. The messages are disguised as encouragement at first, the most obvious is the normalization of months-years of inadequate sleep despite the known adverse effects on mood, behavior, and health. You are more likely to hear “that sucks” from me than an empty platitude with the subtext along the lines of ‘suck it up.’
If you are still asking yourself whether you NEED support or thinking 'I've heard that stuff about the oxygen mask, but isn't it selfish to prioritize myself over my kids?'
What if I told you that one of the most generous things you could do for your kid(s), one of the most healing processes you could engage in that will benefit your kid(s) now and into the future, is to participate in caregiver coaching? Because here’s the thing. You know you aren’t a bad caregiver. I know you aren’t a bad caregiver. Yet amidst the day to day challenges, you second-guess your decisions, you flex your boundaries out of guilt, and you try your damnedest to use various skills you’ve picked up and teach them to your kid(s) with inconsistent success. What you need is some guidance to bring you back to that brilliant inner wisdom smothered by all the noise. We all need a fresh perspective. You deserve clarity and a sense of empowerment and direction to help you get a handle on your unique struggles. We will navigate the uncertainties and challenges, identifying solutions together drawing on your existing inner knowing alongside my years of experience working with struggling caregivers. You need to have someone to vent to, someone to laugh with, someone who isn’t going to judge you, someone who has heard it all. Engaging in this process will allow you to be the the most empowered, consistent, compassionate version of yourself in your caregiving relationships. It is the opposite of selfish. It is a gift. One of the most beautiful things that we know from relational neuroscience is that children learn from what they see, not what they are told. As a caregiver, you have the opportunity to teach by showing what it is like to tend to yourself, act with intention and self-awareness, and grow your capacity for compassion and grace for yourself and those around you. Healing has a ripple effect in often imperceptible directions. If you have ever witnessed someone engage in a healing process and then observed shifts in their close and extended family members or friends, you know this to be true.
Be the change. See the change.
You may enjoy working with me if you:
What Caregiver Coaching looks like:
I will facilitate the collaborative process, relying on you to be an integral contributing member of the problem solving process. That way, throughout our time together, you will feel proud of the effort you put in and have ownership in the outcomes. Many of the coaching participants I work with are already engaged in healing modalities (whether that be therapy or other practices) and are seeking support and guidance specific to their caregiving experience. I commit to being honest with you, even when it’s uncomfortable. If at any time there are issues that are beyond my scope to support you in a coaching capacity, I'll let you know. In some cases, being honest means I will tell you that while I know we can do great work in the coaching context, the limits of coaching mean that you’ll need to to engage other professional services like a therapist or a mediator. Other times, based on the information you share in sessions, I will make a recommendation for a child in your care to receive professional services such as therapy or evaluations.
If you are ready to set goals, receive guidance and feedback, and make the changes that are most aligned with your caregiving values and it sounds like I might be able to help, you can go directly to my coaching specific online scheduler to set up your free 30 minute consultation. We will figure out if I am the best fit to support you in this season of life and I will answer any questions you have. Can’t wait to hear from you!
Differences between Caregiver Coaching and Counseling/Family Therapy
It’s really important that we distinguish what is what here. Caregiver Coaching is present-oriented and focused on achieving goals you want to move toward in your caregiving experience. In the coaching role, I am not able to assess or diagnose you (or your child). Coaching is neither a covered service nor able to be submitted for reimbursement for health insurance purposes, as it is not considered medically necessary service. There are some similarities between coaching and counseling, and I do not combine counseling/therapy with coaching.
We can differentiate the roles and separate conversations that occur within the coaching or counseling contexts with some generalized statements:
FAQs:
* We can thank social conditioning for that. There is a less than honest narrative that humans are fed throughout their lifetimes that glamorizes the role of caregiving/parenting, and leaves out a lot of the messy/hard stuff. When the messy/hard stuff comes up, you won't hear the common refrain 'being a parent/caregiver makes it all worth it' because it's dismissive, invalidating, and not how I roll. Something can be true AND within the coaching relationship, we'll prioritize space and center compassion for the truly challenging moments (and seasons) of being in the caregiving role.
Cassidy is not currently working with any clients in a therapeutic capacity.
First up, let’s tackle the definitions from which I’m operating. Traditionally, this service is marketed as ‘Parent Coaching.’ That falls short of honoring the many roles and family structures in which one might ‘parent.’ If you are a grown up raising one or more humans of any age, you are in the role of ‘CAREGIVER’ and these services are for you.
Folks have the option to sign up for themselves, themselves and a partner/partners, or any combination of grown ups involved in a kid’s life. Here’s to the ‘Raisins’ (i.e., those in the role of “raising” a child). Whatever way you define family will be supported, whether that’s as a solo caregiver, those in Poly or Queer partnerships, marriage, platonic co-caregiving, divorced co-caregiving, step/bonus caregiving, etc.
Here you are. Looking for something. Because you need support and everywhere you look, you see the facade of grown ups raising perfect children, grown ups who never have to say sorry for snapping or shutting down. You see others raising kids with a perceived ease you can’t currently fathom.
You aren’t alone.
Caregivers are bombarded with information from podcasts and reels and books and blogs and unsolicited advice from well-meaning loved ones, and often wind up feeling inadequate.
I see you.
You may have looked into coaching after first looking into therapy for your kid. After some reflection (or a less than stellar therapy experience), you found yourself pondering
‘wait a second, the things I’m concerned about aren’t quite that. I’m more worried about how my role in all this. Am I providing the most supportive environment for my kiddo(s)? I feel like my intentions keep missing the mark, and I'm not sure why.' If this is you, I got you! Your intuition is telling you that what’s called for in this moment relates to how you are showing up. Trust your intuition and get the support you need.
If any of what you have read so far has resonated with you, it’s likely that one of the following statements rings true:
- My kid(s) have some unmet needs that have been elusive to pin down and I want to do everything I can to figure out how to support them.
- The unmet needs have been identified and I’m struggling with taking action to meet those needs.
- There are elements outside of my control impacting my kid(s) social-emotional wellbeing and I’m committed to offsetting those elements by becoming the most attuned, consistent adult in their life. I need some help figuring out how to do that.
- I have my own unmet needs that are making it impossible to show up in my relationship with my kid(s) in a way that I’m able to feel proud of. I feel guilty tending to myself when I know my humans are hurting. Where do I find balance?
- Being in this role wound up being so different than I anticipated (*). How do I allow myself to be human without messing up my kid(s)?
If you are like many participants I've worked with, you are still second guessing this path. You’ve been taught to prioritize your kid(s) and deprioritize yourself. The messages are disguised as encouragement at first, the most obvious is the normalization of months-years of inadequate sleep despite the known adverse effects on mood, behavior, and health. You are more likely to hear “that sucks” from me than an empty platitude with the subtext along the lines of ‘suck it up.’
If you are still asking yourself whether you NEED support or thinking 'I've heard that stuff about the oxygen mask, but isn't it selfish to prioritize myself over my kids?'
What if I told you that one of the most generous things you could do for your kid(s), one of the most healing processes you could engage in that will benefit your kid(s) now and into the future, is to participate in caregiver coaching? Because here’s the thing. You know you aren’t a bad caregiver. I know you aren’t a bad caregiver. Yet amidst the day to day challenges, you second-guess your decisions, you flex your boundaries out of guilt, and you try your damnedest to use various skills you’ve picked up and teach them to your kid(s) with inconsistent success. What you need is some guidance to bring you back to that brilliant inner wisdom smothered by all the noise. We all need a fresh perspective. You deserve clarity and a sense of empowerment and direction to help you get a handle on your unique struggles. We will navigate the uncertainties and challenges, identifying solutions together drawing on your existing inner knowing alongside my years of experience working with struggling caregivers. You need to have someone to vent to, someone to laugh with, someone who isn’t going to judge you, someone who has heard it all. Engaging in this process will allow you to be the the most empowered, consistent, compassionate version of yourself in your caregiving relationships. It is the opposite of selfish. It is a gift. One of the most beautiful things that we know from relational neuroscience is that children learn from what they see, not what they are told. As a caregiver, you have the opportunity to teach by showing what it is like to tend to yourself, act with intention and self-awareness, and grow your capacity for compassion and grace for yourself and those around you. Healing has a ripple effect in often imperceptible directions. If you have ever witnessed someone engage in a healing process and then observed shifts in their close and extended family members or friends, you know this to be true.
Be the change. See the change.
You may enjoy working with me if you:
- are a therapist or other helping/mental health professional who is struggling to apply what you know professionally to your own experience (and then wrestling with shame and shoulds and self-doubt).
- and/or your child(ren) has a neurodivergent identity such as ADHDer, AuDHD, or Autistic and you are looking for affirming support (from a high-masking ADHDer) that is grounded in an anti-oppressive, anti-ableist, and anti-racist lens.
- value holistic healing, whether that be through an openness to or experience with engaging in spiritual practices or alternative healing modalities, turning to
- find yourself as part of a high-conflict co-parenting/co-caregiving dynamic and are ready to redirect energy on what you CAN control. Including:
- improving your capacity for attunement within your relationship(s) with your child(ren)
- increasing alignment between personal caregiving values and the practices you implement, in turn increasing felt safety for your child(ren)
- modeling the behaviors and qualities you most desire for your child(ren) to embody as they grow
What Caregiver Coaching looks like:
- Scheduling *virtual* meetings with me at your pace, whether that is every week, two weeks, month or as needed
- Individualized guidance- no generic advice or curriculum, no encouragement to adhere to a rigid parenting approach
- Exploring your values in order to direct the path where you can feel true to yourself and confident in your decisions and practices
- Building on your existing skills and knowledge in order to achieve YOUR caregiving goals
- Gentle reminders that your intuition will guide you and that you have more influence than you realize- empowering you to discern which of your beliefs are in alignment with your values, versus those born from the stories and advice of others- so you can confidently root yourself in practices and mindsets that work for YOU and your child(ren)
- Taking action steps based in the foundation from which you can move toward the caregiving experience you desire
- Replacing unhelpful conditioning with realistic expectations for yourself and others
I will facilitate the collaborative process, relying on you to be an integral contributing member of the problem solving process. That way, throughout our time together, you will feel proud of the effort you put in and have ownership in the outcomes. Many of the coaching participants I work with are already engaged in healing modalities (whether that be therapy or other practices) and are seeking support and guidance specific to their caregiving experience. I commit to being honest with you, even when it’s uncomfortable. If at any time there are issues that are beyond my scope to support you in a coaching capacity, I'll let you know. In some cases, being honest means I will tell you that while I know we can do great work in the coaching context, the limits of coaching mean that you’ll need to to engage other professional services like a therapist or a mediator. Other times, based on the information you share in sessions, I will make a recommendation for a child in your care to receive professional services such as therapy or evaluations.
If you are ready to set goals, receive guidance and feedback, and make the changes that are most aligned with your caregiving values and it sounds like I might be able to help, you can go directly to my coaching specific online scheduler to set up your free 30 minute consultation. We will figure out if I am the best fit to support you in this season of life and I will answer any questions you have. Can’t wait to hear from you!
Differences between Caregiver Coaching and Counseling/Family Therapy
It’s really important that we distinguish what is what here. Caregiver Coaching is present-oriented and focused on achieving goals you want to move toward in your caregiving experience. In the coaching role, I am not able to assess or diagnose you (or your child). Coaching is neither a covered service nor able to be submitted for reimbursement for health insurance purposes, as it is not considered medically necessary service. There are some similarities between coaching and counseling, and I do not combine counseling/therapy with coaching.
We can differentiate the roles and separate conversations that occur within the coaching or counseling contexts with some generalized statements:
- Coaching services aim to increase confidence comfort in your role as caregiver, while improving caregiver-child relationship(s). This is done by offering new perspectives and supporting you to make changes that reflect your values and intentions.
- Although both coaching and counseling use knowledge of human behavior, motivation, behavioral change, and interactive techniques, there are major differences in the goals, focus, and level of professional responsibility held by the provider.
- In order to maintain the integrity of the coaching relationship, as described earlier there are some situations in which I may recommend that you or your child enter psychotherapy (with a separate psychotherapist or counselor) as a condition of continuing coaching. I may also request your permission to consult with your existing psychotherapist or counselor when appropriate if matters arise that are outside of the scope of coaching and could benefit from therapeutic intervention.
FAQs:
- All services are virtual utilizing google meet for appointments (except for circumstances when Cassidy is off-grid and only has access to cell service).
- Coaching clients can be located anywhere! The scheduling platform is supposed to remain in EST (to maintain my timezone sanity). However, I recently discovered that the appointment scheduling calendar sometimes defaults to my current time zone despite all the EST settings. Until the support team provides a solution, please be aware of the calendar time zone when scheduling and convert the time if necessary (click here for a time zone converter). To receive appointment reminders in your time zone, please customize your client portal to reflect whatever time zone you are in (settings -> Information -> Scroll to Contact Information section and click Edit button).
- Sessions health portal emails come from: support@sessionshealth.com
- Appointment reminders are automatically sent from: noreply@sessionshealth.com
- You have the option to add the appointment to your calendar when you receive an appointment reminder. Otherwise, you’ll need to copy and paste the meeting link that comes in your email and/or text reminder into a browser page for session
- To access the client portal as a new or existing client, use this link and register/login: https://cassidydemos.patientsecure.me/
- As a part-time nomad, sometimes I don't have strong enough service for a video call. If that is known to be the case ahead of time, I'll let you know and call you at the time of session.
* We can thank social conditioning for that. There is a less than honest narrative that humans are fed throughout their lifetimes that glamorizes the role of caregiving/parenting, and leaves out a lot of the messy/hard stuff. When the messy/hard stuff comes up, you won't hear the common refrain 'being a parent/caregiver makes it all worth it' because it's dismissive, invalidating, and not how I roll. Something can be true AND within the coaching relationship, we'll prioritize space and center compassion for the truly challenging moments (and seasons) of being in the caregiving role.
Cassidy is not currently working with any clients in a therapeutic capacity.